As most of you know my oldest daughter has a disorder called Childhood Apraxia of Speech. One of the difficulties of this disorder is that she requires daily repetition to learn and maintain a new skill. This is an area that we have to work to overcome and it’s such a struggle for both of us.
I keep thinking that I have learned the lesson that my mentor says often, “We don’t despise repetitive teaching.” but clearly I haven’t lol. If you grew up anything like me you often heard the statement, “ Don’t make me have to repeat myself!” Or “I shouldn’t have to repeat myself over and over!” But honestly the more I grow up and parent, I realize that these are not statements that should be made. Even with my neuro-typical child, Chloe, I have to repeat myself more than I would like to but the reality of it is that until a child or even an adult has mastery over something they must have repetition.
So why do we get so upset and quickly give up on something that requires repetition and work on our end? Why do we lack the patience necessary to teach our children new skills that they don’t have the development or self-control to do on their own? The more I pay attention in life I have noticed a few things:
- We have to undo what was done and taught so we can learn new things. Our parents did the best they could with us, but some of what they taught and said embedded some falsehoods in us that keep us from growing and becoming. We do have to have things repeated, we do have to try something over and over before we get it right, no matter how many times it’s been previously taught. That’s how you learn to be a better student and eventually a great teacher yourself.
- We live in a culture that makes us feel like we have to be perfect and if perfection is not attainable then maybe we weren’t destined for it. But nothing in life is perfect but Jesus and that’s why we need the teacher, the Holy Spirit to lead and guide us into ALL truth. What we don’t know, in any facet of life, He does. Too often we under utilize His knowledge and wisdom but exalt our ignorance instead as what’s best.
- Lastly, these belief systems will prevent our ability to effectively parent the way that we truly desire. We all want our children to grow up and be smart, adaptable, and savvy in whatever area they have exhibited interest in but how we raise them will have a direct effect on all of this.
I’m no expert but I do see how some of my own belief systems about not wanting to be a repetitive teacher are hindering me as a woman and as a mom and maybe you now see them too. So we have to ask ourselves, “ Do I despise repetitive teaching?”